Posted in back to natural, family, Food, healthy eating, kids, kids eating, laugh, laughing, laughing at yourself, life journey, trying to eat healthy



So today was my parents turn to host Thanksgiving lunch. My brother has recently separated from his wife and they have four boys together ages are 14,13,10,8 So that alone is crazy in a good way they are good boy’s.  Then it was Chris, Emma 14, Corbin 9, myself and my mom and dad.  It was nice the kids played outside playing soccer and falling getting dirty being silly. Then went in the basement to watch movies. Usually there is some fighting, bodily harm, crying and trouble giving but not this time so it was really nice.

So now it’s lunch time we all find our seats get our food and drinks get all comfy and all say how yummy it is. Then the silliness starts first about the youngest choking on a candy but just standing there looking deadpan and so was his Oldest brother. Their mom had to give him the heimlich maneuver. So they all had to make up their own sign language. Next my brother through a jock out there what do you call an Elephant and Rhino baby? elph-ino. So the kids thought that was funny and it was appropriate. My oldest nephew got his foot wedged into one of the table rungs so the way he said owe was hilarious. So I had to tell my Knee getting stuck in the railing of our deck. apparently that needed more explanation then just laughter.

So everyone is finishing up of Corbin has not eaten hardly anything as his slow self. My second oldest nephew decided to tell us a story about the way here and what his dad said to the driver that  was driving really unsafe to close behind so no quick stops thank goodness, then went to pass and almost took his side mirror off. So He said Fuck off you stupid cunt well holy did the kids start a fir of giggles and did he ever get in trouble! Then it’s tapering down a bit then what happens but shy Corbin just decides to throw out this joke at the thanksgiving table “hey dad I was going to tell you a joke but my penis is to long” well oh my god did that ever start off the fits of laughter most where crying so hard they where crying literally. My mom put her hands up to try to stop from laughing and I’m pretty sure it was just my dad and myself that didn’t laugh. Sometimes.  Then they talk about periods and 7-10 days was mentioned and one if the middle-aged cousins asked if he wold get one.  Well doesn’t Corbin decide to pick that moment to blurt out oh Emma gets hers once a month. Poor girl pretty sure she wanted to strangle him. I told him to cut it out he said what it’s true you get one too.

After that I think everyone was basically done with the joking and was asked to finish their dinner so we could have desert. Then they went back outside thank goodness and then watched a bit of a movie and went home.  Just when you think he is to shy he pops out with a joke like this.  Seriously though at the Thanksgiving table? What a kid.  Sorry about the offensive language. Continue reading “BLOG”

Posted in back to natural, family, Food, healthy eating, kids, kids eating, laugh, life journey, natural, trying to eat healthy



So this isn’t a really long post but I just thought I would share.  So if you are parents you may have this problem from time to time or happen to have a robot or a perfect child or you know how to raise them.

So my son who is 9 LOVES (D) mashed potatoes every potato we have ever cooked or have had from other places if not fries I have found away to mash. That was the only way he would eat them. Even 2 weeks ago off the BBQ he didn’t want the baked ones done on there so I mashed them best I could with butter.  He hardly ate much but I’m awesome so I made the effort.

So last night it was rainy, gray and cold so I thought shepherd’s pie meat, gravy and mashed potatoes perfect. I mean it’s not hard but time-consuming as I make one with just meat NO veggies and one with NO meat. So Corbin asks what are we having for dinner I’m starving so thinking wait till he hears this!

Me: Sheppard’s Pie

Corbin: What’s that?

Me: it’s meat, gravy and mashed potatoes on top.

Corbin: I’m starving I don’t even know if I like it.

Me: well it’s not put together do you want some separately?

Corbin: sure

So I go about putting the pie together while he is having the meat and potatoes.

Corbin: Is there more of that stuff?

Me: The pie?

Corbin: No the meat

Me: Yes but it’s all put together in the pie now.

Corbin: Oh I don’t like mashed potatoes do I have to eat it?

Me: Since when don’t you like mashed potatoes? It’s the only kind you will eat.

Corbin: I have not liked them for a while now, I don’t know I just don’t like them.

Me: Oh my for shit sakes (I think to myself) but say oh for frig sakes I made this for you because you LOVED mashed potatoes.

Corbin: Well I don’t so can I try the pie when it’s done then?

As he goes upstairs to play video games and I continue to mumble to myself. Does he eat when it’s done you ask. NOPE! Seriously can’t they tell us this like when they actually start not liking it? I still Love him lots.

Posted in life journey


So I have been mostly writing regarding my daughters anxiety as it’s been the most troublesome lately but, my son who is 10 also is a sufferer. He has always been attached to me since a baby when I used to even go to get groceries it was an ordeal. He has slept over at grandparents houses maybe a handful of times if that much only if it was absolutely necessary, otherwise we would get a call wanting us to go get him.

School was not his favourite but he did go on regular basis and I worked out of the home when he was young. Daycare was a challenge as he didn’t’t want to go and it was a heart break everyday back then Emma was very social and had no troubles going here and there liked school because it was so social, not because she loved the work.

Around grade 1 he started having trouble there was a bully who picked on everyone. Corbin is very much a rules guy and the rule was you couldn’t fight back so he put up with it for a bit and I spoke to the teacher who didn’t said she watched them a didn’t see anything but, it continued and not just to Corbin this was a kid who was often suspended and in trouble. So I wrote to the teacher and she called up Corbin and the bully at the same time and had a chat of course the bully denied it and started to cry and Corbin wouldn’t say anything I mean would you? So after that he lost trust in his teacher and being comfortable in going to her for anything which I understood. We gave him permission many times to defend himself whenever he needed to but, he couldn’t seem to get over the rules.

Grade 2 he had the most amazing teacher and he went to school with no arguments or fights. He had the courage to stand up to the bully and did with no further worry of him bugging him anymore and stuck up for his friends as well. I was hopeful things were turning around. He has always played Lacrosse and has had a lot of compliments that he plays beyond his years and has the hands, knowledge and feet for the game but, lacking the aggressiveness to get after the ball and play defense well and again that’s where the tricky rules come in he doesn’t want to get a penalty or hurt someone by mistake.

Grade 3 was okay not the same teacher and he wasn’t sure of her the only thing he liked was that she used him for all gym sports demonstrations. Near the end I could hardly get him to go for a full week and it was mentioned to me they had a school counselor, I should call the VP and book and appointment for Corbin to see her before school was over to get him at least seen a couple times and set up for next year. So I called and he saw her 1 was supposed to be more but, I couldn’t get him there. Summer vacation was not to bad he usually does a lacrosse camp and NLL players run it so he likes to go hang out see them and hang out. It was even hard to get him up near the end for that and that was not him at all.

Grade 4 the present and the hardest! It started off pretty good then down to about 4 times a week. After Christmas break he was refereed to a Mental Health Nurse to try and help him. Corbin is extremely stubborn, I could yell, cry, take everything away and he still would not budge from his bed if he didn’t want to go to school. Or he would go out the door and then just push his way back in and I could not convince him to get on the bus. Working from home makes that difficult as well because he knows I’m here. It went from 4 days to 3 days and it was a lot of stomach aches and then he would be totally fine later in the day. So there was a lot of explaining of faking it and getting his PS4 taken away and talking about the importance of school. We had to get his stomach tested and blood work done to rule out physical and then start the mental process. Now I’m lucky on 2 days a week last week he cried every morning when it was time to go to the bus. He had pneumonia for a week then he didn’t go for a week and not again today. So we also have him meeting with another lady that’s going to help him with day to day dealings and how to express things into words. He tends to sit in complete silence so he teachers of course think it’s awesome but missing the signs. He has also started to become paranoid and very worried if there are to many people or someone is walking behind us. Loud noises also.

All this with both kids is stressful and heartbreaking. When you are struggling daily with your own Anxiety, Depression and feeling unwell it’s truly exhausting and I constantly feel lost, guilty and helpless. I know they each have a team of people trying to help them through it all but, at home I try it just can be overwhelming. I know from experience if you let it consume you you lose so very much.

Posted in anxiety, dance, depression, family, guilt of passing on anxiety to kids, helping kids anxiety, helping kids depression, kids, kids anxiety, kids depression, kids eating, kids mental health, life journey, mental health

Living with Anxiety and Trying to help two kids through it.

So as most may know I have anxiety and depression recently it has gotten worse and I have been told that I don’t seem like I want to get better or be happy anymore. I must admit that lately I have not been the best at caring for myself and my anxiety and stress has made me feel so unwell and quiet and distant. I am not totally sure why before all this I am about to say as I just can’t remember not putting myself first.

So both my kids have been dealing with anxiety, missing school, counsellors, meetings and me feeling helpless. Emma is in her first year of High School and they have different rules then elementary school as far as attendance and marks. We have recieved two letters from the school board regarding Emma and her time away from her classroom. They need a certain amount of classroom time as well as schoolwork hours. She has missed a lot of school so far this term, to even get her out of bed in time or she wakes up feeling sick or misses the bus. I managed to get her to school for three days only because her brother was sick so I was home and drove her myself. She worked in resource and spoke to the school’s chaplin. When home she had a therapy session she seemed to perk up after that so I was hoping that would encourage her to go to school but, nope I’m feeling a bit lost and guilty I don’t really know how to help push her through her first steps in the morning. I had to get a medical note from the doc. for the school so the board won’t audit the school and ask why she passed if she gets the marks up. Everytime I call the secretary I get anxious but my baby girl needs to come first and that’s what I have to keep thinking.

As for her dancing and her hip injury and physio. Well last dance comp. She danced 4 dances and did well she is going to dance in this next dance competition all 7 I’m really hoping her hip can take it. I worry about her because we where told that no one was replacing her in the dances she couldn’t do so there was less pressure for her to dance and metal next comp. So her contemporary dance she was just scratched, Lyrical she was replaced by another dancer and Emma was so happy because she was younger and super excited. The Musical Theater and Hip Hop her teacher and studio owner took over. The Musical Theater won Platinum and a points trophy award as they are taking crazy pics of the trophy Emma went downstairs because she just felt conflicted. Now I really worry if when she does the dance and they don’t receive the same high mark are they going to blame Emma? she also stepped into hip hop where there was not any extra needed as there is no solo work and a big group. I feel she just does not want to give up dancing yet but she is hurting people when that is happening.

Her french called me. Right now she is sitting at a 20% and I think this is a huge overwhelming factor in her life right know. The school chaplin said there might be away we can drop french and find something else she can get a credit for. I will have to try and have time to call or meet with the vice principle, chaplin, resource, guidance counsellors to see if at this late in the year it is possible. Hopefully that will help with one worry and lesson some of her anxiousness. She has already lost contact with friends and used to hardly ever be home and now seems to want to always be home. It is heartbreaking to watch them struggle through. When you are a parent dealing with the same issues you think it would be easier but, apparantly it is not.

Posted in life journey


Well it’s been forever as I am a terrible blogger apparently not much of a rockstar at affiliate marketing either.

So feeling really overwhelmed these day’s both my kids are suffering with anxiety and it is so very hard to see also frustrating. I do feel guilty as it was probably my gene that passed it along and seeing my tendencies even though I thought I hide it well maybe just not good enough.

My daughter is 14 and I know I have written about her being a dancer, starting grade 9 and having a really hard time with change. It sure has not gotten any better. She has however been referred to a much better Mental Heath nurse that puts things into motion and really looks out for her. We just had a meeting with her school counselor, Mental Health Nurse and Vice Principle last week she has missed so much school the more she stays home the more panicking she does about going back to school. Right now she is worrying and overwhelmed of the work she is missing and going to have to catch up on. She worries what people will think, say so much judgment. The vice principal said he will talk to her teachers and let them know she is struggling and she may need some extra time and some times she may need to leave the class and work elsewhere. It’s up to Emma how much she wants to tell them. The counselor’s where very supportive told her they had her back and what days they where in the school and what to do, who to go see when the where not.

Dance of course is her outlet she has already had a competition and this is her first year doing duets so it’s pretty stressful and exciting all at once. The only problem know is she is noticing that the Studio is staring to show favouritism and it hurts her very much and she feels very left out. It’s a really small team so things like that get noticed and quickly.

I have hope and faith in her that she can pull through with so much support behind her. It’s just she has to make those couple first steps herself and they seem to be the hardest.

Posted in 100% pure, affiliate marketing, anxiety, back to natural, beauty, boca terry, bracelet, clothes, dance, dancing with argos, dancing with cheerleaders, dee watch, depression, design, essential oils, family, fashion, fashion forward, Food, got oil supplies, guilt of passing on anxiety to kids, Harmonious minds, healthy eating, helping kids anxiety, helping kids depression, high quality, high touch fabric, interchangable straps, kids, kids anxiety, kids depression, kids eating, kids mental health, lacrosse, laugh, laughing, laughing at yourself, life journey, mann cup, matching watch and bracelet, mental health, naked zebra, natural, natural beauty, oil supplies, oils, peterborough lakers, rose gold and silver, Sahara tea, scandinavian, southern europe fashion, supplies, trying to eat healthy, Uncategorized, vibrant colours, watches, wrap around watches


So Affiliate Marketing yeah so hard. Not that I didn’t think it wouldn’t be hard I guess maybe I don’t have as much time as I thought I would have. I still really want it to work out I know I would like it. I signed up with Young Living as well they have such fantastic essential oils, suggestions, support system and no synthetic products. Most of the affiliate products I market are Vegan beauty products, natural teas and home furnishings. I may have accepted to many affiliate jobs right off the bat and in 5 months have sold absolutely $0. CJ Publishers sent me a note saying that and letting me know that if I don’t make any in next 30 days I will have to re sign up.

I have this Blog apparantly I am terrible at writing so I need to work on that. Pinterest, Venndy and Tailwind. All those take lots of time to start. I think I have to do some more reading lots more reading and posting more posting. So when they say its easy as I said before its not unless you have a lot better luck then me which isn’t’t hard like at all!

Posted in anxiety, back to natural, depression, guilt of passing on anxiety to kids, helping kids anxiety, helping kids depression, kids anxiety, kids depression, kids mental health, life journey, mental health


So It’s been a really long time since I wrote last promising to document how my affiliate marketing was going. As to that it’s still going work in progress and have not made a cent. I have also in fairness put it on the back burner due to other issues.

So as most people are aware I suffer from Anxiety and Depression If sarcasm was a illness I would suffer from that as well. My kids have been having a really hard time with something fighting something. My 14 year old daughter has anxiety and I know I have mentioned before how high school has been really hard for her due to so much change. Well she has had mood swings (I know she is a teenager) uncontrollable crying, feeling of disappointing people, three letters from the school regarding how many hours/days she has missed and how many she needs to pass her classes. She was seeing a Mental Health Nurse but they are only provided for 12 weeks and then they have to move on. You have to be 16 to be seen in the Mental Health Medical departments. It was suggested that she try a anti-depressant which she did and unfortunately didn’t work for her it seemed to make her worse. I know that you have to try more then one to find one that works but, our doc would like to try other options first. So we have been in a bit of a sunken heart, how can we help situation. I have her on the waiting list for a counseling program and received a call from the School’s main mental health nurse she will be referred for another 12 weeks with the same one Corbin see’s who we love. Hopefully that will help her I suck at this because I suffer the same things and I’m supposed to be pushing her to do all this things that make her upset. Chris doesn’t’t understand so he can sound harsh but she probably needs a bit of that sometimes he tends to carry on longer then needed and that just makes her more upset. I can’t say to much because he gets very defensive and immediately says well I’m sure its my fault so bring it on. It’s hard to see your social butterfly put herself back in her chrysalis.

Now onto Corbin still having such a hard time getting him to go to school for a full week. I know I’m being judged and everyone says just make him, take his stuff away. I have done both many, many times! I can yell all I want but if in his mind he is to sick to go there is nothing I can do to get him out of bed. Take away all electronics it doesn’t’t matter he won’t budge. I cry, Chris yells he even drove home to school once when he was ready before refusing to get out of bed and he refused to walk doesn’t the hallway at school just stared at Chris trying not cry. So home he came and we also didn’t’t know what we could do as he is only 9. I heard that his school also had a main mental health nurse so he saw her a few times and then got referred onto someone for the 12 week program. He is also on the list for counseling. He can’t settle at night just can’t shut his mind off so he can’t get to sleep early wakes up early and has a stomach ache. When he gets tired he gets mad easy he doesn’t’t know yet how to control it that is something we are working on as well so hopefully we can get ideas to help them through. I am an enabler and that makes Chris the bad guy. So all in all we are struggling that way.

It could be worse we could be really sick physically or have family members critically ill. thanks for reading the rambles.

Posted in 100% pure, affiliate marketing, back to natural, beauty, boca terry, bracelet, clothes, dance, dancing with argos, dancing with cheerleaders, dee watch, design, essential oils, family, fashion, fashion forward, Food, got oil supplies, Harmonious minds, healthy eating, high quality, high touch fabric, interchangable straps, kids, kids eating, lacrosse, laugh, laughing, laughing at yourself, life journey, mann cup, matching watch and bracelet, naked zebra, natural, natural beauty, oil supplies, oils, peterborough lakers, rose gold and silver, Sahara tea, scandinavian, southern europe fashion, supplies, trying to eat healthy, Uncategorized, vibrant colours, watches, wrap around watches


So In my last blog like over a month ago I was talking about doing Affiliate marketing to make extra money and hopes to make it my full time job. I also told you the process and how hard, how much time it would take and so on.

Well my friends it is long and hard. I wasn’t expecting it to be easy as I know that’s click bait or people just have that kind of either luck, connections or knowledge. The first two I don’t have never been much for luck, working on the knowledge as it is never ending. I went from one affiliate to eleven so it quickly became overwhelming. I still haven’t come close to entering all the products as one company has about 100 other companies to enter. Not complaining there is a lot of potential if I can just get it all going. I have read so many articles and been on alot of companies wrote stuff down and re wrote stuff down. Researched, researched and researched still not sure how it’s going to go or get it going. I signed up with CJ affiliates they have a whole bunch of different companies you can apply for you basically write a mini resume and send it off. They will reply through CJ and if accepted they have speacial links you can copy and paste them onto your web-site. You can pin, venndy you have your own code so when someone clicks to buy they know it’s you and you can collect comission.I am still trying, trying, researching, reading and typing and posting and hoping. This is all in hopes that by summer at least I will be making some money and be able to work into it full time. I am also newly signed up with Young Living and need to get that going what’s hard is that alot of people in my area sell it already and know each other. It’s really good oil’s high quality and a really amazing support, kind and knowlegable group. It is alot of work and I will probably still read up on new articles on whats the best way. Just to let you know if this is something you want to pursue this as well and you are not a populor blogger, have your own sucsessfull you tube channel, or instagram with a thousands or millions of followers it is not as easy as they make it out to be! If you have a daytime job it is very time consuming so just realize that I know for myself because I have kids it seems some evenings that is all I do some weekends as well. It has been a couple months and I have posted as you can see on my website although right now things are all over the place. After a couple months I am still imputing on Venndy and then puting into goups called stories then posting on Pinterest, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Website. I do not have a large following so that is most likely why I have sold absolutely nothing. I have hope so again if you are interested make sure you do as much reading as possible and think of what it is you want to sell some company’s the commission is higher then others and the time from the costumer clicking on your link to buying someting is open longer then others. Learn about CJ and Share a Sale affiliates they seem to be the biggest company that sells a wide variety of product and companies. Also maybe check out Venndy and then Tailwind if you are going to be using Pinterest. Well I should get back at it and maybe try and fix this website see what happens. I wish you lots of luck and I will keep you posted yes I have sucked its been a month or more I do apologize. Blog soon,